How do you teach your kids about death, it’s easy just learn from the living lecture by Randy Pausch, Carnegie Mellon professor. Every parent needs to view the “Last Lecture: Achieving Your Childhood Dreams” on line. I can never do justice to this profound message, but did want to chime in with a few thoughts.
Randy says his last lecture was for his kids, I think it was for all kids!
Here are just some of the points Randy made that touched my heart with lessons every parent needs to teach their children.
Pausch says, “Relationships are what matter in life, not things”.
I say, “Please remember this when you are trying to change your children’s behavior by taking away ‘things’ or giving ‘things’ to your kids. Your connection with your kids is what makes for healthy behavior not things”.
He says, “Let your kids draw on the walls”.
Now, I am not sure if he literally means this, but the point is let kids be kids and I couldn’t agree more. The only time in our lives when we can experiment without huge consequence is in childhood. Childhood should be fun.
When Randy said he has learned how really good people are through this experience; that really hit a cord with me. Throughout my professional life people inevitably ask me how I cope with seeing all the ‘bad’ kids and parents. My answer has always been my job has shown me, just like Randy’s experience, that there are many more good parents and kids than bad.
Randy’s message about sincere apologies is profound.
He says, “Teach kids to say, I’m sorry, it was my fault and how do I make it better”? When I am working with parents, I always say, “Teach your kids not just the words I’m sorry, but what those words mean. I’m sorry means you will never do that again”.
Lastly, with tongue and cheek he tells his young daughter to, “Ignore everything a guy you’re dating says to you, just pay attention to what he does”. I say, “Following through with what you say to your kids teaches them to trust”.
Thank you to Randy for unimaginable courage.
Please join me in sending our prayers to him and his beautiful family, Dr. Ann Corwin
One Comment
I did have the great pleasure of watching The Last Lecture when he was on Oprah and it really changed my way of thinking both personally and with my kids. I’m a single mom of three children and this was a wake up call for me. I recently purchased his book which goes into more detail about The Last Lecture and it was even more touching and awakening for me. I think every parent should watch his lecture and read his book. Of course my thoughts and prayers go out to him and his family. I do have the upmost respect for Mr. Pausch and the amazing way his has chosen to deal with his life threating illness. He really has some powerful words to teach everyone of us! Have a wonderful day and thank you for letting me share my comments.