California is on fire. The red flames leaping off our hills, the grey & ash filled air and the constant television & internet images of the total devastation of so many of our communities leaves us and our children fearful. Fear for our friends, relatives, neighbors and ourselves.

As a parent I am scared about when and where the next fire will start and when the current fires will stop and if my family will be in harms way next. Children have the same fears, but don’t always know how to ask their parents about what they feel, see and experience.

So what’s a parent to do?

• Keep your children close, because you make them feel safe.
• If they are 4 years or older ask them to talk about their fears of the fires.
• Keep them away from the constant TV coverage.
• Lastly, talk about the differences between realistic & unrealistic fears

Example you can say to your child:
“It is a “real” scare to think about a fire hurting you or your house. In our family when we feel scared we talk, touch (hug) & trust that we will keep each other safe.”And, then say:
“It is absolutely not scary to go to school, play games in your house or drive to the store to get groceries for dinner.”

Example of what you can do with your child:

When your children are not with you, let them take something from home as a reminder of you and their home to reassure them in these uncertain times. Objects help all of us make sense out of how we feel. Your child can look at a picture of you in their back pocket and it reminds them that you are there with them.If you are a family that has been directly affected by this devastation, like losing a home or loved one be sure to seek professional help in your county. Parents supporting parents during this fearful time, is a model to all children that they will be safe.

My thoughts and prayers go out to all the California families affected by the fires. Please feel free to contact Dr. Ann for any support or questions.