New Baby
Here’s what Dr. Ann Corwin, The Parenting Doctor, has to say about a new baby:
Everyone is so excited especially your older child that the new baby is coming. Your older child touches your tummy and says baby. They see the room being made ready for the baby.
If your older child is younger than 5 years, they have no idea that the baby is going to stay FOREVER and that time and attention will be taken away from them in order to take care of their new sibling.
This fact in and of itself is extremely scary to children. Because in their young brains they think that if this baby is not going anywhere and just showed up so fast, then maybe they will disappear just as fast. That is why lots of kids will make sure that do anything and everything to be noticed when a new baby arrives, so that there is no way they will be replaced by the new baby and disappear quickly themselves.
Two easy ways to prepare yourself and your older child for this confusing and scary time is to:
#1 Go to Target or Wal-Mart with your older child before the baby comes and let them buy socks for THEIR new baby. Then have them practice every morning picking socks and putting on a baby dolls feet, just as you will have them do when the new baby comes.
Calling the new baby THEIRS gives them ownership and everyone knows when you ‘own’ something you always treat it much better. Plus, it helps the older child believe that they are irreplaceable, because otherwise who will put the socks on the baby.
#2 Moms, before the baby comes, stop what you doing abruptly 3 to 4 times each day (it hopes to do this different places too, like the mall, grocery store parking lot) and announce you need to feed the baby. Then grab your own baby doll and your child can have theirs too. While you sit and feed have your older child do the same thing specifically each time. For example, read the same ‘feeding time’ story and they only get you to read it to them when you are feeding the baby.
Enjoy this wonderful time of introducing a new family member, but also remember your other children are scared about this fascinating change in their family.
Written on January 7, 2010 – 9:00 pm
Posted in Dr. Ann's Column, Dr. Ann's Place for Parents, Elementary School Years, First Year, Hitting, Kindergarten, Lying, Mean Girls, Pacifiers, Thumbs, Fingers, Preparing For A New Baby, Preschool, Sharing, Sibling Rivalry, Sleeping, Sorting Out The SuperNanny, Talking Back, Tantrums, The Teen Years, Toddler Years, Toilet Trials, Whining
January of any year is famously all about promises. At the beginning of the year we usually reflect on the last and resolve to change in the year ahead. Change is good, it means we are moving forward and not feeling so stuck. But, where I always get stuck is the ‘talking’ about change instead [...]
Written on October 31, 2009 – 2:56 pm
Posted in Dr. Ann's Column, Dr. Ann's Place for Parents, Elementary School Years, First Year, Hitting, Kindergarten, Lying, Mean Girls, Pacifiers, Thumbs, Fingers, Preparing For A New Baby, Preschool, Sharing, Sibling Rivalry, Sleeping, Sorting Out The SuperNanny, Talking Back, Tantrums, The Teen Years, Toddler Years, Toilet Trials, Whining
www.parentsask.com is a new place to go on the Internet to get interesting, informative, and accurate parenting information. It’s a place for you to ask questions about your kids. You talk to other parents, get their opinions and suggestions for any issue you are facing in your family. You can post a question yourself, ask [...]
Written on July 17, 2009 – 10:38 pm
Posted in Dr. Ann's Column, Dr. Ann's Place for Parents, Elementary School Years, First Year, Hitting, Kindergarten, Lying, Mean Girls, Pacifiers, Thumbs, Fingers, Preparing For A New Baby, Preschool, Sharing, Sibling Rivalry, Sleeping, Sorting Out The SuperNanny, Talking Back, Tantrums, The Teen Years, Toddler Years, Toilet Trials, Whining
Summer vacation… kids cannot wait and parents look forward to less structure and fun. But by the middle of July, the dreams of carefree summer fun seem to fade. Why?
Kids love to predict: they want to know what’s coming next so they can manage their behavior. Even though it sounds great to just relax, [...]
Written on June 28, 2009 – 11:44 pm
Posted in Dr. Ann's Column, Dr. Ann's Place for Parents, Elementary School Years, First Year, Hitting, Kindergarten, Lying, Mean Girls, Pacifiers, Thumbs, Fingers, Preparing For A New Baby, Preschool, Sharing, Sibling Rivalry, Sleeping, Sorting Out The SuperNanny, Talking Back, Tantrums, The Teen Years, Toddler Years, Toilet Trials, Whining
Ever get up “on the wrong side of the bed” and don’t know why?
At one time or another just about everybody experiences not knowing why they feel the way they do. Kids get even more confused than parents do about their feelings. All kids behaviors are in response to some sort of feeling and most [...]
Written on June 11, 2009 – 12:13 am
Posted in Dr. Ann's Column, Dr. Ann's Place for Parents, Elementary School Years, First Year, Hitting, Kindergarten, Lying, Mean Girls, Pacifiers, Thumbs, Fingers, Preparing For A New Baby, Preschool, Sharing, Sibling Rivalry, Sleeping, Sorting Out The SuperNanny, Talking Back, Tantrums, The Teen Years, Toddler Years, Toilet Trials, Whining
Fathers should be appreciated all year… not just on one day! While Father’s Day is a tremendous idea, we all need to affirm Dads for their significance every day of the year.
I come from a long line of fantastic fathering men. My grandfathers were both grand fathering me from birth to their deaths. My Dad, [...]
Written on May 8, 2009 – 9:46 pm
Posted in Dr. Ann's Column, Dr. Ann's Place for Parents, Elementary School Years, First Year, Hitting, Kindergarten, Lying, Mean Girls, Pacifiers, Thumbs, Fingers, Preparing For A New Baby, Preschool, Sharing, Sibling Rivalry, Sleeping, Sorting Out The SuperNanny, Talking Back, Tantrums, Testimonials, The Teen Years, Toddler Years, Toilet Trials, Uncategorized, Whining
In celebration of Mother’s Day, I’d like to share a special poem with you that was given to me by a mom that I had been working with earlier this year. She was a new mommy having trouble adjusting to being a stay-at-home-mom after the birth of her second child. She came seeking guidelines in [...]
Written on March 4, 2009 – 12:50 pm
Posted in Dr. Ann's Column, Dr. Ann's Place for Parents, Elementary School Years, First Year, Kindergarten, Pacifiers, Thumbs, Fingers, Preparing For A New Baby, Preschool, The Teen Years, Toddler Years, Uncategorized
Oprah’s show this week about the “Little Girl Found Living Like an Animal” reminded us all what devastating effects neglect has on children.
Even if kids are not severely neglected they suffer if their parents don’t have a relationship with them.
Dr. Bruce Perry www.childtrauma.org is not only the leading authority on child abuse and neglect, [...]
Parents that ask the most questions about raising their children are the most courageous.
Offering advice to friends and family about what worked for you as a parent is excellent. Just remember to give the advice ONLY when asked and don’t take offense if other parents don’t take it!
If you get unsolicited advice from well-meaning [...]
After watching the ‘town hall’ final segment of this voyeuristic entertainment T. V. show I thought I would join in with other professional parent educators.
Look what I found out…
ZERO to THREE, The National Association for the Education of Young Children and The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry plus many more organizations [...]
Written on July 1, 2008 – 6:46 pm
Posted in Dr. Ann's Place for Parents
G.I.F.T. or Giving Intimate Family Time is the American Academy of Pediatrics recommended practice of immediate skin-to-skin contact between mother and newborn.
Here is how it’s done: A quick check is done to be sure the baby is thriving outside the mother’s womb. Then immediately the baby goes right on the mother’s chest and abdomen, skin-to-skin and both are wrapped together with warm [...]
